Being honest means choosing not to lie, steal, cheat, or deceive in any way. When we are honest, we build strength of character that will allow us to be of great service to God and to others. We are blessed with peace of mind and self-respect and will be trusted by the Lord and others.

You see yourself as wanting and needing love, usually more than you are receiving. You feel insecure about being lovable, but your ego is there to boost you (or not). You love others, for the most part, according to how much they love you or appeal to your sense of romance, sexuality and compatibility. Relationships involve a constant negotiation between what you want and what your partner wants. The words that apply to this love include the following: passion, attachment, dependency, merging, romance, mutual need, liking and compatibility.
When you aspire to a higher kind of love, ego and neediness begin to count for much less. You feel that love can be a healing force that binds everyone. You can love someone else without needing anything from him or her. Such love begins to be less personal and attached. Your awareness expands, and you feel less insecure. Love becomes more mature and peaceful. Relationships involve mutual appreciation; there are fewer conflicts between two defensive personalities. The words that apply to this love include the following: idealistic, calm, unselfish, giving, empathic, forgiving and accepting.

I am now accomplishing that goal. I am graduating. I should look at this as a positive experience, esp. However,  I cannot say that I am any more intelligent than my peers. I can attest that I am only the best at doing what I am told and working the system. Yet, here I stand, and I am supposed to be proud that I have completed this period. I will leave in the fall to go on to the next phase expected of me, in order to receive a paper document that certifies that I am capable of work. But I contest that I am a human being, a thinker, an adventurer – not a worker. A worker is someone who is trapped within an aggrement – a slave of the system set up before him. But now, I have successfully shown that I was the best slave. I did what I was told to the extreme. While others sat in class and doodled to later become great artists, I sat in class to take notes and become a great test-taker. While others would come to class without their homework done because they were reading about an interest of theirs, I never missed an assignment. While others were creating music and writing lyrics, I decided to do extra credit, even though I never needed it. When I leave educational institutionalism, will I be successful or forever lost? I have no clue about what I want to do with my life; I have no interests because I saw every subject of study as work, and I excelled at every subject just for the purpose of excelling, not learning. And quite frankly, now I’m scared. THAT MY GRADUATION SPEECH

One of the most difficult things we humans are ever called upon to do is to respond to evil with kindness, and to forgive the unforgivable. We love to read stories about people who have responded to hatred with love, but when that very thing is demanded of us personally, our default seems to be anger, , depression, self-righteousness, hatred, etc.It shows that when you forgive you live a longer and good health life. When a person  is to developing a habit of gratitude and let go of past hurts. Want to live a long, happy life? Forgive the unforgivable. It really is the kindest thing you can do for yourself. Your enemy may not deserve to be forgiven for all the pain and sadness and suffering purposefully inflicted on your life, but you deserve to be free of this evil.  "hate is like an acid. It damages the vessel in which it is stored, and destroys the vessel on which it is poured.

It's quite natural to hear the word "sacrifice" and immediately think of having to give something up that you like. You hear of people making sacrifices in life such as sacrificing leisure time to work more hours to earn more money, or sacrificing a weekend break to be able to pay the rent, or other such things of that nature. But there is more to this circumstance than meets the eye and when you learn how to really make proper use of sacrifice, you will discover there is a great deal to be gained. The first thing you need to do is to change your impression of what exactly sacrifice is. Don't think of it as having to lose something, but instead think of it as sacrificing something of a lower nature in order to gain something of a higher nature. The chess player understands this concept well. When playing the game, a certain piece will be sacrificed in order to win the game, or to gain an advantage over the other player. They give up, say a bishop in order to be able to take the opponent's queen in several moves further along.

Living the good life means different things to different people. There is, however, a slightly ambiguous, mutual understanding. “The good life” is the life that you would like to live broken down to its most basic form. It deals with the simple pleasures that make you happy, the compassionate deeds you perform, the personal goals you strive to achieve, the relationships you nurture and the legacy you leave behind. Sincere personal fulfillment is generally the collective end result. “The good life” is also about appreciating all your time, not just your leisure time. Far too many people get caught up in the mad rush of a corporate lifestyle and grow completely numb to the little moments, the simple building blocks of time that make life magical. Time, after all, is the single greatest element of life.

It is a learning and bonding experience, and a portal into manhood.   Ubuntu’s work has always been rooted in the community. We are very proud of the trust we have built up with local elders, who have let us into their inner circles to advise about health issues.   Circumcision cuts the risk of HIV infection significantly, and we help decrease the risk further by testing all the abakhwetha. We talk with them about what it means to be a man, gender equity, and sex education. We do this through workshops and games, so the boys have fun while learning.   When the boys go into the bush, we visit them to help make sure they are having a healthy, safe, and positive experience.   Ubuntu is part of the fabric of the Eastern Cape, and, as we watch our boys grow up, we are privileged to help usher them into response

The tradition of the Beginner of the Way of the Nazaretha movement, the Suffering Servant Isaiah Mdliwamafa Shembe Although the year of his birth is not exactly known, it can be estimated, that he was approximately 66 years old, when he left this earth in 1935. He was born at Ntabamhlophe (Estcourt district) in the Drakensberg region (near Giants Castle) where his forefathers settled, when they escaped from the regiments of the Zulu KinShaka. Later, the family moved further on to Ntabazwe (Harrismith district) in the Sotho region of the Orange Free State, higher up in the Drakensberg mountains. The Shembe family, however, was of pure Zulu breed and originated from Zululand. The father of the Prophet Shembe was Mayekisa, the son of Nhliziyo, the son of Mzazela, the son of Sokhabuzela, the son of Nyathikazi. They were from the Ntungwa tribe with the praise-name Nhlanzi (fish) from Donsa. The mother of the prophet was Sitheya, the daughter of Malindi Hadebe, and was born at Mtimkulu.

Dealing with the death of your parent may be the hardest thing you ever have to do in your life. Though you won't ever be able to truly "get over" it, there are many steps that you can take in order to honor your parent's memory while being able to go on with your daily life. The important thing is that you should give yourself time to process the loss and avoid being hard on yourself if you think it's taking "too long" for you to deal with your parent's death. There is no timeline for grief, and you'll be able to move forward when you're ready.

How did it happen?

It was a long distance relationship but I never really felt the ''distance''. We used to communicate on a daily basis. Like every other relationship, we had our own ups and downs but it was still all beautiful.

Then I don't know what happened and he changed. He changed, all of a sudden. The duration of calls reduced from one hour to one minute. The number of texts reduced from hundred to ten a day. I started spending my entire day waiting for a single call or text from him. Not that he was busy with studies and stuff. He would even spend his time alone rather than spending it with me. And even when he called, it used to be nothing more than a formality. The love and the affection went missing all of a sudden. It hurt a lot but I chose to stay quiet forcing myself to think that it was nothing and I was just over thinking things. And then one fine night he dropped the bomb.

The true meaning of friendship is when you consider the other person's well-being to be as valuable as your own.  If you feel this way about a person, you are truly their friend.

If you consider that another person's good is as important as your own, you will treat them the way friends are supposed to treat each other.  You will make sacrifices for them when, by doing so, you can help them.  You will make sure that you are behaving in ways that will not hurt them.  This is the essence of friendship.

If you are not friends with someone, you may care about their happiness, but not as much as you care about your own.  But if you are true friends, you will care as much for the other as you do for yourself.

what is love???

 I searched online for a definition of love and the results were muddled and confusing. Some even stated sexual desire was love. Really?

The reason there are so many different definitions is because love is not being studied. It’s been expressed in writting  poems, musical lyrics and other artistic ways, but there has been very little  research and investigation  about  love.

Most people have  accepted that love is indefinable. I dont understand why is this so? because  Love! is the One of  the most extraordinary and satisfying experiences we can have as human beings.

Whenever a guy proposes to me here I respond with, “30 cows”. Then they laugh and tell me that’s far too much, because the average price for a bride here is 12 cows.

Traditionally in South Africa, after a man proposes to a woman, he must negotiate “lobola” with the bride’s family. Lobola is a practice where the bride and groom’s fathers, or other men in their families, meet to discuss how much the man will have to pay to marry the woman.

The average arranged payment is 12 cows and each cow costs around  8500 each. The price is lowered by one cow per each child the bride has given birth to before marriage. Nowadays the negotiation process is a little more modern, and the groom can pay in cash or split it between cash and cows. The negotiations must be done by men from both families, or else it is a disgrace to the ancestors. Once the negotiations are settled, the plans for the actual wedding plans start forming.

Zulu weddings last three days. On the first day of ceremonies, the groom’s family travels to the bride’s family’s household to partake in a traditional ceremony. All men and women are dressed in Zulu traditional dress. Women wear an isidwaba (wrap around beaded and pleaded skirt), beads, and an isicholo – a straw hat that is beaded. Men wear amabheshu – a cow skin cover-up and carry a Zulu shield, also made out of cow skin. That why i love my tradition so much.

Babies are named before they are born in Zulu. There is no naming ceremony in the culture, but only a ceremony called imbeleko to introduce the baby to the ancestors and to thank them and ask them to protect it. For imbeleko a goat must be slaughtered as a sacrifice to the ancestors a goat is always slaughtered for a feast that involves talking to the ancestors, and the family elder responsible for talking to the ancestors will call the baby by its name when presenting it to the ancestors at the same time the goat is being slaughtered. Zulus usually carry more than one name, it can be several names given by members of the extended family. Names usually denote the family's expectations and encouragement for a baby; some reflect the family's experiences or how they relate to others in their community, sometimes they tell about the time/how the weather was like when the person was born, and so on. Also common are names that reflect religious beliefs and political beliefs. 

Umhlonyane is a traditional ceremony done by the Zulu people for girls when the girl reaches the womanhood stage. The head of the family it might be an uncle, father of the family slaughter a goat for this ceremony.

A week before the ceremony, the girl is kept in a separate room away from other people, where she will stay inside and comes out on the day of the ceremony. By the time she is in that room the elder women visit the girl to give advice and guidance on how to behave as a teenager .

Before the day of a ceremony, the girl's friends (same age) come to stay with her until the next day. All the girls apply ‘white soil’ all over their bodies. In the morning they go to the river to wash their bodies. On their way back to the homestead they sing traditional songs that are relevant with the ceremony.

 

Educating rural areas about eating disorders

when my lecture in behavoural studies discussed with us eating disorders it came to my attention that peolple from rural areas that are not educated they are less informed about such diseases. As i was raised in rural areas i think that this kind of information have to be shared with the population in the rural areas. Eating disoder are the most common element sorrounding all eating disoders is the inherent pressure of low esteem.There are 2 types of disorders that are commonly kown Anorexia and Bulmia. Rural population think that when you fat you are well nourished this was an intresting topic from last years module.

This year my most intresting subject is food and nutrition it intrests me beacuse it teaching us about that we wre not aware of such health guidelines as well as our food intake parttens that has never cross my mind until i have attended this module

It reminds me of just how blessed I am. The truth is that I very nearly missed out on becoming a mother - thanks to being brought up by a rabid feminist who thought motherhood was about the worst thing that could happen to a woman. 
You see, my mum taught me that children enslave women. I grew up believing that children are millstones around your neck, and the idea that motherhood can make you blissfully happy is a complete fairytale.

In fact, having a child has been the most rewarding experience of my life. Far from 'enslaving' me, three-and-a-half-year-old my angel has opened my world. My only regret is that I discovered the joys of motherhood so late.I was raised to believe that women need men like a fish needs water, but I strongly feel children need two parents and the thought of raising my angel without my partner would be terrifying. 

As the child of divorced parents, I know only too well the painful consequences of being brought up in those circumstances. Feminism has much to answer for denigrating men and encouraging women to seek independence whatever the cost to their families.

Umemulo is a ritual which is very similar to umhlonyana but it is like a 21st birthday celebration. It is a ritual done for a girl who has reached the age of 21; it is an  appreciation from parents to daughter. To appreciate that their daughter has behaved herself until the age of 21 as it is usually for girls who have never been pregnant. It is also a way of saying that our daughter has grown and ready for marriage. In some instances you find that girls, especially first born child, may be faced with problems or get seriously ill if they did not have this ritual. Even if they already had children, they may need to do umemulo, especially before they get married. Usually when a girl is getting married and they did not have umemulo, the parents may take one of the lobola cows and perform the ritual.
The process of umemulo is very much like that of umhlonyana but the main difference is that, when doing umemulo a cow is slaughtered, if the girl did not have umhlonyana they may start with slaughtering a goat. And it is done for a girl that is 21 years or older but not younger unless a girl is getting married before the age of 21, it is to say you are old enough to get married, you have reached womanhood and the young men can come and make you their bride.

Umemulo for me, is important, your parents show that they appreciate the way you have behaved until reaching this stage. You are also prepared for marriage, you are taught on how to be good bride and wife. I would much rather 

who ami?
I am a woman that is infear for anything you can call m a go getter cause i always make sure that i do what i have to do in oder to be some one in life. I have my weaknesess which but i make sure that iam the only person that knows my weekness because once someone ackeknowlegde your weakness they will make sure that they hurt you in your weaknesess. I also have my strong points which i always show off to people because that encourage me to do my best in everything.
This poem definetly explain who am I

Things that makes me happy in life is when I achieve my goals. At the beginning of every month I write down goals that I must achieve in order to make my self happy because I have learnt that no one can make me happy besides my self so one of my goals is that when I have a test I study with other students so that they can give me tips on how to study and this has helped me a lot because I can see the different in my marks and this eliminate  disappointing my self .

Loving yourself is an important part of enjoying and getting the most out of your life. It's also important for get and maintain a satisfying relationships with others. Loving yourself is mainly having self-respect, which is the only dependable way to create love in your own life. To be able to be loved, you must love and respect yourself as much as you do others.

Stop trying to be perfect. Stop criticizing yourself for not being  perfect. Always do your best and always know that by not achieving what u want u not a failure ... Remember that no matter what, you will always be perfect just the way you are, flaws and all.





Stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone o is unique. We all have different gifts. When you compare yourself to others, it makes you feel bad about yourself.

What a sad day today i am so confused why some other things have to happen. Last week thursday i arrived late for my first class, as i came in the lecture gave me  the activity. A while later other students arrived, few minutes  later the lecturer was asking about her memorundum that is lost she searched everyone no one admitted that he/she took the memo and she said she is not going to give us the answers well the class ended.

On wensday the lecture came to with names saying that she checked our answers and it seems like we were coping from her memo, so she wont mark our papers because i was one of the students that arrived late for class therefore this matter will taken further because this is a serious offence. I am not blaming the lecture but i am so sad because i do not know anything about the memo but this has taught me a lesson that i must always arrive in time for class.

Things we sometimes do affect us in life for example I havev noticed that most of the student do the same mistakes over and over again i am writting about this because i am one of the students who do same mistakes over and over again this worries me because it feels like i am not learning from my mistakes. Last week we had a power point presantation, in this presentation we had to give our lecture a hard copy for marks we failed to do that and that came with a failed result wish made me think why did this happen.  It because we lack time management because i can not say it is lack of intrest because our topic was intresting.

This are the things that most student fail to do but this year i will make sure that this wont happen again because this has affected me emotional and in my marks.

Varsity life

My biggest struggle while I was in first year was time management. There was just a lot of work to cover from the different modules, and on top of that, I had to make time for sleeping socializing time, attending lectures, first year activities and the list goes on and on. So learning how to manage your time will help you in your day-to-day varsity life and you’ll have loads of fun in the process and less stress. Make use of the counseling facilities at your varsity so that they can help you map out a schedule that will be good for you.

As much as varsity is fun and you’re on your own, it teaches you to be responsible for yourself because there’s no one there to baby you and smack your hand when you do something wrong.